Trying to Conceive - what I have learnt

If you follow my blog you will know:-
a) I'll be turning 40 this year
b) I just got married in 2012

Hence starting a family is very much on my agenda.

But I also believe in giving a one year time to settle down in my marriage before I conceive even though my age factor was always niggling me.

Anyhow after 7 months of marriage, we decided it's time to try to conceive. Well suffice to say, the process is not as simple as I thought it would be.

Because the first time we let the sperm in, I suffered from stomach cramps as well as wind or abdominal bloating which led me to a mistaken belief that I was pregnant.

So off to a visit to a gynae after I cleared my period for an explanation of the cramps and discomfort.

My gynae explained that sometimes there could be bacteria or etc in the sperm which did not agree with my body and hence prescribed 2 dosage of antibiotics for myself and one dosage to hubby. She said that this will solve the cramp problem in the future.

Zithromax 250mg to be taken 4 tabs in one go

Metronidazole 400mg 1tab twice daily until finish

So I was back to square one.

In trying to conceive, I discovered:-

1) the more expensive the PREGNANCY TEST KIT, not only is it more accurate because it is more sensitive to hCG level, it will be able to test conception even before your period is due.

Assuming you have a regular 28 days cycle, the first day of period is counted as Day 1, then you should ovulate sometime on the Day 14. So your period will come after Day 28.

So if you are pregnant, meaning around Day 14 your egg was fertilised but the kit wont be able to tell you that immediately as your hCG level is too low.

The earliest would be like Day 24 (meaning 4 days before your period is due) but First Response kit claimed it can detect pregnancy 6 days before period is due but then many of these results are inaccurate and you will have to do a second test.

So if a person say that she is positive like just 1 week after her wedding, then you know that she conceived before her marriage because there is no way a home pregnancy kit can tell you that. Hehe.. this is just extra gossipy info.

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2) besides pregnancy test kit, there is the OVULATION KIT.

This is especially helpful for those whose monthly cycle is not regular and therefore need this kit to let them know when they are OVULATING (in rough terms it means when the eggs has come out, ready to meet the sperm).

If you are not ovulating, then there's no egg to be fertilised.

So this is a great kit to let you know in advance when you are likely to ovulate. This kit usually comes in more than 1 piece cos hey you'll need to test you urine every few days to help pinpoint the date.

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3) in trying to conceive, there is only a small window each month during which you can conceive, typically no longer than about 6 days, but since sperm can survive inside the body for about 5 days, it's good sense to have intercourse a few days earlier than before you ovulate.

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4) they always say to have more sex in order to increase your chance.. BUT having more sex at nearly 40 years old is not easy when it's sometimes not wet down there.. so you reach for your Durex lubricant.. BUT NO.. turn out normal lubricant can potentially kill the sperm.. but no lubricant means no easy sex..

Stuck in this problem I googled and came across lubricants which are sperm friendly. It may cost more, but it's definitely worth it.

I read that K-Y Jelly by Johnson and Johnson might also harm the sperm so I bought Pre-seed Fertility Friendly Lubricant instead.

Read my next blog on Pre-Seed Lubricant for more information (click pre-seed-fertility-friendly-lubricant).

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5) fertilisation in itself is not the end, as the seed must implant itself to the uterus before it's good to go.

Not only that, the position which it implants is also very important..

Because some embryo plants itself outside the uterus (a.k.a. ECTOPIC PREGNANCY) which can be very risky for the mother as the fetus grows it can damage mother's surrounding internal organs.

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6) so what do you do when you get a positive reading from the pregnancy test kit?

Well the instruction on the pregnancy kit says to make an appointment with the doctor asap.

I realised this advice was WRONG as I went to see the gynae a day after the kit showed positive.

But I was only 4 weeks + 3 days *gestational age pregnant, so the doctor couldn't see anything on the ultrascan. Just saw gas. Bummer!!

The earliest to see the positioning of the embryo is when you are 5 weeks pregnant.. Hence I wasted RM80 on the consultation and ultrascan fee :(

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Side note:-
* gestational age vs fetal age
gestational age is age of fetus counting from the first day of your last period
fetal age is actual age of the fetus, meaning counting from day of fertisation

Doctors prefer gestational age because most women know when they had their last period but who knows when the fertilisation actually happen, right?

That is why doctors prefer gestational age. Also partly because it's easier to track the pregnancy based on 40weeks gestational period (9months cycle).

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7) I realised that conception is pretty much a miracle by itself and should not be underestimated as we are involved in a delicate process of creation.

So it's important to stay healthy before you get pregnant, meaning if you have weight problem, blood pressure problem, vaginal infection problem, etc - SOLVE IT before you conceive because once you are pregnant, there are a lot of medications, creams etc which are off limits to you, including flu medicine.

Last but not least, whatever faith you profess, always commit your plans to God and He will see it through for you.